It can be difficult to set limits with our in-laws, but when the boundaries we do set are breached, cultivating a trusting and respectful relationship becomes impossible. And if these limits are crossed at least once, it will lead to more conflict. Read the story to know what happened between the couple and let us know how you would deal with such a situation.
Source: Reddit
My husband (35) does not have a car. He sold his old one to help pay for his brother’s wedding. I did not agree on this but he had this car before we got together so it’s a shared property. besides that I have my own car so that did not affect me til my husband started complaining about having to commute to work and hangout places. He tried to get me to let him drive my car several times but I stood firm and put a boundary making him understand that my car will never be driven by him (one of the reasons why is because of how bad his driving is).
His brother lives out of town. My husband asked if he could drive my car to the wedding but I refused but not because I’m not invited (another story for another day) buy because like I said my car is off limits. He threw a fit calling me unreasonable to let him take public transportation because he can barely stand it for 10 minutes let alone hours. I said it wasn’t my problem which irritated him but made him stop arguing about it.
The day that he was supposed to travel out of town. I woke at 10am and couldn’t find my car key. I went outside and couldn’t find my car either. I was beyond pissed. I called him and like I expected, he took it and was on his way to the other town. I lost it and told him I gave him no permission to take it for whole 5 days and said that if he won’t turn around with it and come home then I’d call the cops and report it missing. His response was “You wouldn’t dare do it cause you know what would happen” I hung up on him then immediately called the police and told them about my situation. I did NOT tell them my husband took it because they’d think it’s a family dispute and decide to not get involved. I just reported it missing.
2 hours later I got a call from my husband saying he was back in town and was being held at our local police station. I went to the station and talked to the cops. My husband made a scene there swearing over and over that I gave him permission to take it and said I was acting out of jealousy and spite because he was going to attend a wedding that I was not invited to. I took my car and went home but he had to stay a little longer.
He came home in the evening and went on a rage fit about how I created an awful situation and almost caused him to miss his brother’s wedding. He called me vindictive, bitter and a lunatic to call the police on him and try to accuse him of stealing my car. He had to leave the same day to be able to be there with his family and decided to extent his stay and he still hasn’t gotten back yet.
Right now his mom and brother are blasting me for what happened and calling me spiteful. Did I go too far here? What should I do?
Here are a few comments on the story where it was originally posted:
