Parenting is difficult. Each parent has their own method of raising their child. Spouses at times don’t appreciate how their better half looks after the kids. Scroll down to read what happened in this story and share your thoughts on this.
Source: Reddit
My (32f) ex husband Mark (34m) and I have three children together. Two boys and one girl, they’re all 9yrs old (triplets).
Our daughter’s name is Ellie, and she’s always been much more sensitive than her brothers. She just behaved differently than they did, and in the beginning I dismissed it as the boys being identical and her being the fraternal triplet, but with time I realized it was more than that. Ellie was eventually diagnosed as autistic when she was 4.
She’s a very sweet and very quiet kid, she doesn’t talk very much, and she absolutely hates too much sound. Anytime we have to go somewhere, I bring her noise cancelling headphones and a few of her favorite stim toys just in case the headphones don’t help enough. Lately, when she has a meltdown, it dissolves into a panic attack and then she’ll just be completely nonverbal for a day or two. I hate seeing her go through that, so I do everything to help her manage and avoid her triggers as much as possible.
Mark thinks I coddle her too much and that my efforts to help her avoid meltdowns and sensory overloads are actually just me giving in to her tantrums. He’s gotten better about that mindset since his girlfriend Marissa (33f) moved in with him, but sometimes he and I still argue about it.
It’s supposed to be his week with the kids, so I was just at home catching up on some cleaning when one of my sons called me on Marissa’s cell. He said that Ellie had shut herself in her closet and was refusing to come out, and that their dad was getting upset with her about it. I asked him to put his dad on the phone. Mark immediately started telling me that he could handle Ellie’s fits and that our son shouldn’t have grabbed Marissa’s phone to call me, but I told him that I at least wanted to talk about what had triggered Ellie to begin with, and I wanted to talk to her as well just to see if she was okay.
He said Ellie was refusing to talk and that he’d call me back when she decided to start speaking again. As soon as he hung up on me, I grabbed my keys and drove over to his house. Marissa let me in and I went upstairs where he was lecturing Ellie through the door, and I could hear her sniffling. Mark looked pissed to see me but the boys were standing there so he didn’t say anything about it.
Eventually, I got Ellie to come out of the closet, and she burst into tears and begged me to take her home. She wouldn’t let go of my hand and didn’t want to go anywhere near her dad. I knew that she’d probably lock herself away again if I left without her so I told Mark that if she was feeling better in the morning I’d bring her back.
He texted me a few times after we left, saying I ruined his time with Ellie and the reason she hates it over there is because I always come to her rescue.
I told my mom about it and she thinks I shouldn’t interfere with the kids when they’re with their dad even if there’s an issue, because I’d hate it if he did the same thing to me. Am I really wrong?
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