When you’re in a relationship, there are a lot of things you have to do jointly. Chores aren’t the most enjoyable thing in the world, but they’re necessary. However at times one must help in doing a little more chores when his/her partner is extremely busy with work. Read the story to know what happened between this couple and what you would have done.
Source: Reddit
I (f30) run a small online business from home. November and December are my busiest time of the year when I make a lot of money that allows me to work less during the year. I’ve been doing this since I was 25 so I’ve got a decent idea of what I can and cannot do. And focusing on work only for 1-2 months is a sacrifice I’m willing to make for the chill rest of the year.
This year, I’ve moved in with my boyfriend (m35). Well, technically he moved in with me because i own the house so it was a no brainier for him to move in with me.
We split chores half and half. He works full time (37.5 hours a week). When he moved in, I had a talk with him letting him know that I can’t do any chores in November/December and asked if he could pick up the slack because I’m physically unable to do any chores as I can be working anything between 12-18 hours a day (I take a full January off to decompress). He said he doubted I worked that much but we will see.
I asked again in September and October to make sure he was aware that I won’t be doing anything (I meal prepped in advance) and I felt he kind of dismissed me. Mid November, we had an argument about my chores not being done and I reminded him of what I told him.
He said that he thought I wasn’t being serious and told me there’s no way he’d do 100% of chores because he’s working too. I said fine, don’t do my chores, they can wait until I have time. That’s how it was when I lived alone, no problem, I don’t make much mess anyway.
He wasn’t happy but dropped it.
We haven’t seen each other much because I’ve been working so much but he’s been more and more pissed off and blew up at me today regarding the chores.
He said I had to have a better work life balance and to grow up because the house was a mess. I told him if it was a mess it was his fault because I barely leave my office.
He called me a lazy bi***h. I told him k didn’t have time for arguing and went back to work.
He stood in front of my locked office door shouting how he couldn’t believe I was being serious about not doing chores and it was an a**h**e move to leave it all to him.
He thinks I’m a major AH for basically disappearing for 2 months and following through with not doing chores. Am I really the a**h**e for saying I won’t do chores and following through?
Here are a few comments on the story where it was originally posted:
