Source: Reddit
Over the summer, me (39F), my husband (42M), and my son (7M) took a trip to Myrtle Beach.
We had a great time at the beach and we stopped at a nearby gift shop to pick up some souvenirs. My son spotted a toy ball with cute strawberry characters on it. He absolutely loved it and begged me to buy it for him. I told him that maybe Santa would get it for him for Christmas. I then purchased the ball and put it away for Christmas.
Four months go by. Not a week goes by that my son doesn’t mention the ball. Quite frankly, I’ve never seen him so excited about something before. I was super excited for him to open it on Christmas morning.
So Christmas rolls around and my husband and I give my son his gifts. He opens the ball and he’s ecstatic! My husband, on the other hand, was less than thrilled. He knew all about the ball but apparently he had never taken a “close look” at it. He tells me he’s “concerned that our son would want what was clearly a toy for girls”. I was shocked and tried to explain that it was just a toy ball and it didn’t really matter who it was marketed for. He dropped the conversation and I thought the issue was settled.
So fast-forward a week. The ball suddenly goes “missing” from our house. My son is distraught and I have no idea where it went. My husband then reveals to me privately that he had given the ball to his brother to give to his younger niece and purchased him a different one (Spiderman, which, granted, he loves).
I was obviously livid. I reminded him of our son’s love for the ball, and how excited he was to get it. I told him that what he did was incredibly insensitive and thoughtless. Husband argues that he did it for the “greater good” and that he was “protecting our son from bullying.” I replied that he was being ridiculous and that our son wouldn’t be bullied for having a toy that is traditionally viewed as being for girls (to be honest, it didn’t even look like a girl’s toy!).
So here’s where I may have taken things a bit too far: I told my son “The reason why the ball is gone is because your dad gave it away to someone else without asking.” My husband was immediately angry with me and told me that I’m “trying to turn our son against him” and that I should have “left it alone.”. He’s dead set on the fact I’m in the wrong here, but I feel like I was just telling the truth and that it needed to be said.
Looking back, maybe it was a bit wrong of me to tell my son the truth as that’s going to hurt him and strain their relationship. But at the same time, I don’t think it’s right for my husband to interfere with our son’s Christmas gift without consulting either of us first.
Perhaps I could have handled the situation better by not telling our son. Am I Wrong?
Here are a few comments on the story where it was originally posted:
