“Am I The [Jerk] For Wearing A White Dress To My Friend’s Wedding?”

Wedding are all about a good time but at the same time can be stressful. In this story a girl had to attend her friend’s wedding. Knowing how significant the event was to her and how much planning went into it, this girl even recommended the buddy chose her attire together. Read the story to know what happened after that.

Source: Reddit

I (20F) met my friend Charlotte (21) when I moved into my college dorm in August 2020. We got along well, shared ideas for how we wanted to divide space and keep things clean/organized, and had many similar interests. Within a month we were studying & hanging out together, and I considered her a good friend. I also met her now-husband Josh (22). They seemed like a cute and loving couple, and I was very happy when they got engaged on Christmas 2020 after 3.5 years together.

Charlotte has spent the last 18 months planning this wedding down to the last detail. I won’t say she’s obsessive, but it’s been INTENSE and I’ve tried to help her as best I can with making appointments, managing stress, etc. I also gave her $250 to help pay for the wedding (her family can only afford part of it) which isn’t included in the wedding gift I’m going to give her.

A month before the wedding, I was still trying to decide exactly what to wear. I wanted something nice, because Charlotte said she would have a photographer, videographer, and wedding painter. I knew Charlotte had a vision for her wedding and I wanted her as in control as possible for all the details of her special day, so I asked her which dress out of the three I’d narrowed it down to that I should wear. She asked if I would actually pull out all my dresses, so I did. She ended up narrowing it down to one of my picks, along with a dress I had put firmly in the “no” pile for being white. It was a wedding after all. She told me both dresses were lovely, but that she prefers the white one. I asked if she was sure, and she said yes, and even picked out a pair of pink and white heels from her closet to go with my dress. I figured that was that.

Fast forward to last week, I showed up in the dress about half an hour before the ceremony. I get some weird looks, but no one says anything. In hindsight, this is when I should have realized something wasn’t right. When Charlotte comes out of her dressing room for some last minute pictures, she looks shocked to see me, and then she starts turning red. She pulls me aside and starts going off on me immediately about wearing the dress to her wedding. I’m stunned. I ask her what the problem is, because SHE picked the dress out, and she told me it was a “friendship test” and that if we were real friends then I wouldn’t have worn a white dress or her shoes to her wedding. I started laughing because I honestly thought it was a joke, and she screamed at me that I ruined her “ f-ing wedding” and to “gtfo”. I flat out told her she was crazy and left, not wanting to fight anymore and not knowing how to deal with what happened. I grabbed my wedding gift for them on the way out.

My phone has been flooded with texts, voicemails, and social media notifications from her, her friends, and her family about what an AH I am, but I honestly don’t see what I did wrong. Am I really the Jerk  here?

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