Source: Reddit
I(32f) co-parent my 13 year old, Lily, with her father. We are generally flexible with days and neither of us have a problem with the other.
A few weeks ago he texted me “could I pick up Lily Friday September x instead of y and drop her off a instead of b.” When I asked him why he said his brother in law passed away and his funeral was Saturday and he wanted to leave Friday. It was in a city several hours away.
I agreed to this, I wasn’t happy with her missing school but I compromised.
A few days ago a friend of mine sent me pictures of him with Lily at a ball game from that Friday in the city where his BIL’s funeral was. He never told me anything about that.
I texted him and asked what was up with that and why he had lied and he said that he hadn’t lied, it’d been a “lucky coincidence” “their” favorite team was playing in that city and he figured they might as well go to a game to see some of her favorite players. I asked if she had homework she should be doing and he said she had “plenty of other time” to do it and this was “important to him”. I am very big on the importance of Lily doing well in school so this was upsetting to me that he put a child’s game and something he wanted to do over her schoolwork. I don’t even think she likes the team for any reason other than to connect with her father and I think this was mostly for him because I see all the “nostalgia” stuff he posts on social media about the team.
I told him he shouldn’t have left that out of the plan he gave me and that I wasn’t changing custody anymore for his mothers birthday, and that he could pick her up and then drop her off a few hours later but she wasn’t staying overnight and I wanted those hours back later .
Now he’s incredibly upset at me and called me an a%#hole for “overreacting”. I just want Lily to understand an education is important and to be prioritized and be surrounded by people that understand that. Am I Overreacting?
Here are a few comments on the story where it was originally posted:
