A family gathering where your parents meet your lover for the first time is a happy and nervous moment. How would you feel if your parents blindsided your lover during the gathering. Read this story and let us know how would you react to such a situation.
Source: Reddit
I (25F) have been dating this guy (33M) for 9 months now. He’s amazing and I’m head over heels for him and he’s the same for me. My boyfriend had a tough past, he had a rough upbringing and spent some time in prison over a decade ago. Once he got out, he turned things around and managed to build a very good life for himself.
I found out about his past on our third date. I asked him about a small tattoo on his arm, which turned out to be a tattoo of the date he was released from prison. None of that mattered to me because it was in the distant past. I briefly mentioned it to my sister one day and did not go into any details about it. My sister and I have always shared things about the guys we date and I always thought it would stay between us. Or so I thought.
On Sunday, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents for the first time. We went over to their house for dinner and everything was going well until my dad brought up at the dinner table the fact that my boyfriend had spent time in jail. It blindsided my boyfriend and I. I did not tell them about it beforehand so I immediately realized it must have been my sister.
My parents proceeded to question him about all that, asking why he was in there and making jokes like “it takes a certain someone to go to jail” and “you don’t go to jail for no reason”. Those things were said in a “jokingly” way but it felt condescending and I’m sure my boyfriend felt it too. We ended up cutting dinner short and I had an individual conversation with my dad and basically told him that what they did wasn’t cool and that I was mad. He kept saying they were joking but it didn’t feel that way.
I apologized to my boyfriend on our way home and he just said “it’s okay babe. it’s to be expected”. He said it in a defeated way which told me that he was hurt. He never said this to me, but I imagine that being judged over one’s past, especially when you’ve built a great life for yourself, must feel awful. I feel so guilty for all of this and although he seems fine, I feel like it affected him more than he wants to tell me.
I don’t know what to do. I regret not being more vocal when all of it was happening, I’m not good at confrontations. I’ve been thinking of calling my parents and telling them they need to apologize to him as soon as possible but my sister (who I confronted) says I should let some time pass and make them apologize next time we see each other which is god knows when. What should I do?
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