Parenting is not an easy task. Certainly, there are many happy moments and smiles, but there are also times when parents are at their wits’ end. As children become older, it appears that they desire to push the boundaries more and more. They could try to sneak in some additional screen time or stay up late messaging or reading without permission. They frequently turn to being clever with their words. This one can be difficult. So, is it okay to cease parenting a child when they go too far? Read this story and share your thoughts on this.
Source: Reddit
I know this sounds bad but let me explain a little. I (35F) have a (14M) son. I do everything I can for my son and make sure he has everything he needs. Lately he has been acting out a little at home and school so I decided to sit him down to try and figure out what was happening. He is my only child and his dad and I are still together. I tried to sit him down and ask why he was acting out.
I was concerned if maybe it had something to do with myself or his father but he wouldn’t budge. I asked him if there were any issues going on at school because if there was I would be more than happy to help him. I was scared there would be bullying at his school and I was prepared to transfer him to another school if necessary. He said there was no bullying and he had no issues. He just felt like “14 year olds should act out a little”.
I told him his behavior was not allowed in my house. His behavior consisted of swearing at myself and his father, swearing at his teacher and much more. I tried so hard to discipline him as much as possible. So here’s where the issue started. After a little fussing with my son he said “my life would be better if I didn’t have a mother.” I was extremely hurt. I said “okay.” And went on with my day. I prepared dinner for myself and his father. Not for my son. When my son smelt food he came downstairs and asked where his was. I responded “I made dinner for myself and your dad. Since life is easier without a mom there’s some heatable food in the freezer.”
My son went absolutely crazy. He stormed to his room and did not come out until today morning. Normally I would take him to school but today I did not. He came downstairs expecting his breakfast that I make for him every morning but there wasn’t any. He said “where’s my breakfast?” I responded, “your mother would normally do that for you. But if life is easier without one you’ll need to prepare your own breakfast. Also take the bus to and from school.”
After a few swears he made himself some cereal and took the bus. I suppose my son called his grandmother (my MIL) about this and I received many many calls saying I was a horrible mother, that I’m starving my child and I’m being petty. I thought this was a good way to discipline my child and make him grateful for everything he has. I’m starting to think I messed up. Did I go too far here?
Mother posted a few updates
Edit for info: later today when he gets home from school I plan on sitting him down to have a conversation that what he said really hurt me. I do not plan to bring up the fact he called my MIL. I have never hit, scream, or swore at my child I would never do this
Edit 2: my son had a half day so I texted him asking if he would like me to pick him up or the bus. He texted back saying he wanted me to get him. So I did. In the car he immediately apologized for what he said and he said that his friends were acting out so he wanted to fit in. His friends got suspended today for something they did and they wanted my son to join. My son did not and he said he was sorry for how he was acting. I also apologized for my actions.
Edit 3: I wanna say thank you all very much for your comments! When my son got home he cleaned his room and even offered to help with dinner to learn to cook. In only a few hours our relationship has gotten better and our communication has gotten better!
Edit 4: regarding my MIL: she actually found this Reddit post (not sure how) and she is currently blasting me all over Facebook and numerous social media. All is well with my son. We are working on talking about our issues and he has agreed he would start therapy. Those who say I’m “abusing” my child have never seen real abuse that children are actually faced with. My son is safe and well taken care of. Anyways, thank you all for the love!
