Weddings are supposed to be a joyous occasion, but for the protagonist of this story, her engagement party dinner turned into a nightmare. After inviting her immediate family, close friends, and even allowing her younger brother to bring a plus one, the night took a sour turn when the brother’s girlfriend loudly demanded vegan options at the Italian restaurant where they were dining.
Source: Reddit
I (24F) recently got engaged and had an engagement party dinner this past weekend. I am currently still receiving backlash from this and want to get some outside opinions to see if I was in the wrong.
My fiancé and I invited both of our immediate families and close friends to this dinner (about 30 people).
The dinner was held at a nice Italian restaurant in my city. Our invites gave our guests the option to choose between a meat option and a fish option for their mains. It’s important to note that the only people in both mine and my fiancé’s families who, I guess, have food restrictions are my dad and stepmother, as they’re pescatarian. But a lot of people in our family love seafood so the fish option was chosen more than the meat option.
My younger brother (20M) contacted me about a week before the dinner to RSVP and ask if he could bring a plus one, his new girlfriend. He chose the meat option.
Now my brother dates around a lot and is always bringing new girls around, so I wasn’t aware that he was even in a relationship. I told him yes and that I’d have an extra seat for her.
The night of the dinner comes, everyone is having a good time, I meet my brother’s new girlfriend, and she seems very sweet.
When it came time to eat, she pulled one of the waiters aside and LOUDLY asked him, “Are there any vegan options?”
The waiter looked confused and said, “We have a fish and a meat option for the mains. “I can offer you a salad and some roasted potatoes and other veggies as a substitute if you wish.”
Brothers girlfriend started getting mouthy with him and said, “Well, what if I don’t want a salad, huh? You just assume that because I’m vegan I only eat salads? What if I want some pasta? What kind of restaurant is this? This is discrimination”.
My brother started trying to calm her down, but she started going off on ME, saying, “Why would you pick a restaurant that doesn’t have vegan options? “Many people are vegan nowadays; it makes me feel alienated that you couldn’t even think to accommodate me”.
I explained to her that the only people that have food restrictions here are pescatarians, so that’s what I considered when I chose the restaurant. I didn’t even know she was coming until a week ago, the reservation had been made a month ago.
She started saying it’s embarrassing on my part that I can’t accommodate all my guests and called me “small-minded” I told her “Sorry I didn’t think to accommodate you; I’ll consider that in the future, hopefully you’ll be around long enough for me to be able to do so”.
She ended up leaving. My brother walked out with her, and has been messaging me that I should apologize to her because I embarrassed her in front of everyone. I told him she embarrassed herself. My moms have also been on my case to apologize, to be the bigger person, and to keep the peace. Am I a jerk for making her feel alienated?
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