Heather Duckworth is a typical parent in many respects, but one thing sets her apart. She lost her small son on June 12, and has since worked tirelessly to spread her vital message to other parents.
Heather posted her experience on Facebook under the title “The Blue Stain” in 2019. When you read it for yourself, you instantly realize why it touches so many people’s hearts.
THE BLUE STAIN The other night I was scrubbing up some slime that my daughter had let ooze through her fingers and slip…
Posted by Love, Faith & Chaos on Monday, 23 April 2018
Heather was scooping up some slime from the floor after her kid had dropped it. At that point, everything became clear to her.
Heather had to jump in there and assist since her kid had done her best to wipe up the slime stain.
She was irritated by the circumstance, as any parent would be. However as she started cursing under her breath, she recalled a different stain.
A blemish from 14 years ago Heather had three two-year-old triplets and a four-year-old son at the time. She had not yet given birth to her daughter.
On this particular evening, mom was having difficulty putting her four energetic sons to bed. Life was a tornado of bustle and nonstop commotion with four small kids at home.
She spent much of her time running after her children, frequently feeling as if she were on the verge of a third world war.
As night fell 14 years ago, she remembered the strain of feeding and washing all four boys while also cleaning up after the normal mess.
The kids had music blazing and rushed about singing and dancing, as usual, full of excitement. This would be the last time in a long time that such an environment would prevail in the home… for a variety of reasons.
In the middle of the pandemonium and her attempt to get the boys to bed, she noticed a massive ink-blue stain on the carpet.
Jacob, one of the triplets, stood close, holding a broken pen with ink all over the carpet. It was also on his clothes, torso, and pretty much everything else in the room!
Needless to say, Heather lost it when she saw this. Her patience was running out.
She quickly felt very sad as she grabbed her baby and brought him to the toilet to clean him up, and my husband began cleaning those brilliant blue spots on their carpet. Her eyes sting with frustration tears. She was just exhausted and furious. She wasn’t angry with her kid, who was as blue as a Smurf, but she was angry with herself for putting the pen out where her toddler could access it, the mother said, adding, they’d barely been in this property for six months, and the carpet was totally destroyed. They washed the stain for an hour that night, but it was still there.
Heather and her husband even hired expert cleaners, but it was all for nothing.
The stain continued to irritate her, and she was upset every time she saw it as she felt like a failure for leaving the pen out where her small kid could access it. That blue stain was a huge downer in her life. She despised it.
But, as her dissatisfaction with the stain grew, it all vanished in a single, life-changing instant.
The small child who had broken the pen that day was diagnosed with cancer shortly after. And Jacob was gone two years after the devastating news.
The blue stain lingered when Jacob got to heaven.
Heather now wants all moms to understand that young kids will always create a mess. Raising small kids may be very difficult, and as they grow older, parents encounter additional hardships and problems.
The blue stain is now a regular reminder for Heather that life with kids might be messy, yet it is worth living.
It serves as a regular reminder to not sweat the small things. A continual reminder that “things” don’t matter, yet individuals do.
A continual reminder that mishaps do occur. A continual reminder to let go of the little details and concentrate on what really counts.
Heather describes the mess as a “blessing in disguise,” admitting that she would deal with a million blue ink stains if it meant she could spend one more day with her baby.
She want to urge moms and dads all around the globe not to get preoccupied and upset by everything going on around them, and to remember to appreciate the simple things in life, which may be irritating at times.
Heather continues to clean, wash, and scrape after her kids, yet she is continually reminded of the time she spent in the hospital with her son.
MISS THIS FACE I really miss this face. The face of my son. It has been almost 13 years since he passed away at the…
Posted by Love, Faith & Chaos on Tuesday, 2 April 2019
It’s critical to remember to stay focused on the essential things in life and not get too angry when your children create a mess, even if it means leaving lasting ‘blue stains’ behind.
Dirty pajamas, smurf faces, and big carpet stains are signs that we did something right along the way. We had a family.
