Source: Reddit
Me (F.) and My ex husband (M.) are divorced. We have a 16 yo son together “Mason”. I got remarried to my husband (M.) Nathan.
My ex husband and I used to argue on who should get Mason for the holidays back when he was little. As he got older we started letting him decide. Last year he spend Christmas with me, Nathan and my inlaws and he complained that the experience was “terrible” because he said Nathan and his family had little to no accomodation for his food choices (I’m not defending them but my inlaws are quite traditional when it comes to food and a bit ignorant to what types of foods Mason eats). He also said he didn’t feel as welcome as the other kids in the family and that Nathan forced him to share his personal stuff like his phone so that his step nephews could watch Christmas movies.
Yesterday, during breakfast we were talking about christmas and what we were planning this year but he out of nowhere announced that he’ll be spending this Christmas with his dad at a rental christmas cottage in his favorite town. I was stunned, so was Nathan. I asked Mason when and how he agreed to this arrangement but he pointed back to what happened last christmas and said he didn’t want to basically “have another shi**y holiday and be miserable” I told him that his dad should’ve come to me first but he argued that he’s already okayed it and so he saw no need for my opinion. We started arguing and he started complaining about me trying to ruin the experience but in response I told him that he has already ruined Christmas for me and his stepdad the minhte he agreed to this arrangement. He got up and walked away after saying that I was being “overdramatic”. Nathan just sat there and looked down.
I had a huge argument on the phone with Mason’s dad and he kept giving me an attitude and laughing and saying that I sounded pathetic. When I told him I’d have my lawyer call him, he backpedaled and said he wouldn’t have done this if Mason didn’t like it. He urged me to drop it and let Mason have this experience or he’ll resent me for missing it. Now Mason isn’t speaking to me. Nathan is trying to convince him to stay with us because without him, our Christmas is ruined but he won’t budge from the looks of it.
Am I A Jerk for not dropping it as well? What I meant by “why didn’t his dad come to me first” is that he planned to take Mason out of town which is a big deal to me. There’s going to be traveling.
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