The two most desired things are love and money. Finances are a typical source of marital conflict. Read the story to know what issue took place between the couple and what do you think they should do?
Source: Reddit
I 28F have been married to Eli 29M for 10 years. Yes, we got married very young & now have two amazing kiddos Layla F8 & Mika M6. When we got pregnant with Layla he basically told me that he didn’t want me to ‘stress’ with school & work and wanted me to be a SAHM & he would take care of everything financially. Although I wanted to make my own money & have a degree to fall back on, he reassured me that I wouldn’t need it because he would be my ‘provider & protector.’ Eli comes from a very traditional family and believed gender roles were necessary for a successful relationship/ home.
After high school, he started working for his father which made ‘providing’ easy for him at such a young age.
Our relationship has been amazing. We both did our parts to make sure our home was running smoothly, I have been a SAHM & wife taking care of everyone & everything and he has kept his promise from 21 and always made sure money wasn’t an issue.
Now that my kids are a little older, I have more time to focus on doing things I love. About 2 years ago I started creating content and for a while it was just a hobby. Last year my platform kinda blew up & I started working with a lot of brands who paid me very well. I also started to diversify my income by building my own brand which is doing well thanks to my following. That + Ad Rev + Brand deals allowed me to make about the same as my husband.
As time has gone by, things keep getting better for me. This past year, I made a little more than he did. I am very open with him & told him how much I make. I thought he’d be happy for me, and for a while he was. Recently he has been acting differently and the other day he told me It was about time I contribute financially.
I was told according to gender roles, it is not my job to provide & protect and that I was perfectly fine cooking, cleaning & raising the kids full time. It’s not my fault my ‘hobby’ makes more than his full time job. I also said if he wanted me to help out he needed to humble himself & start doing some of the work I do at home.
He is pretty upset & our friends think I should be helping out since I am making more.
Edit: For everyone asking, I’m not being selfish & keeping the money just for myself. Thanks to my income We now have an emergency fund, college fund for both our kids, & they now go to private school & tutors. My kids also get to have life experience they otherwise wouldn’t. There are plenty of other things I do to contribute financially, just not willing to go 50/50 if he doesn’t even want to watch the kids on his days off.
Here are a few comments on the story where it was originally posted:
