Divorce is difficult for everyone. Especially the children. In this story of a woman who assumed she was happily married with children learnt the truth that her husband was cheating on her. Read the story and let us know what the wife should do.
Source: Reddit
My ex-husband and I divorced four years ago because he cheated. He had an affair baby (Juniper, 3yoF) with the other woman but Juniper’s mom passed away when she was 1yo. Aside from my ex-husband and his family, she doesn’t have anyone else because her mom grew up in the system.
He and I have 4 kids (Joshua 20M, Cassidy 16F, Nate 11M and Jacob 8M), when we divorced Joshua cut him off and Cassidy followed him soon after, they don’t visit him anymore and has never met Juniper, he has always blamed me for that because ”I kept his children away”, he might be an awful husband and partner, but he’s an awesome dad, I’ll give him that much.
Nate and Jacob still visits him and are close with his baby, I tried once to take the three of them out when she was younger but it wasn’t for me, I know she’s blameless but I can’t separate her from my ex’s betrayal, so know every time I pick Nate and Jacob up I try not to engage much. If she says hi, I say hi back, if she waves, I do too, but nothing more.
Now, every time I pick them up, she starts to mumble ”mama, mama”, I’ve tell her things like ”No Juniper, I’m not your mom”, ”Call me [my name], I’m fine with that”, last time she actually ran at me calling me mama and began to cry when I didn’t pick her up and took her with me.
Listen, I don’t think my ex is telling her to call me mom, but that’s how Nate and Jacob acts (specially Jacob, he runs at me saying ”mom! mom!” and hugs me, so I guess she’s copying his behavior). Yesterday my sons spent Easter with my ex’s family, and Juniper ran at me again, I said hi and my ex asked for a second which I said yes.
He basically told me that seeing me picking the boys up, being affectionate and loving with them is confusing and hurting Juniper, she’s a baby and she doesn’t understand what’s happening, so he asked me if I could just take her with me for a few days like I do with the boys and maybe, over the time, let her call me mom.
I said absolutely no, that I’m sorry for Juniper, but that I won’t be playing mom with her and that I’m only keeping a relationship with both of them because of our son’s. He called me heartless and pointed out how she cries when I leave without her but I said that it wasn’t my problem and that he should deal with that. He later sent a video of Juniper crying by the door and said ”I hope you’re happy” so.. Am I the Jerk ? I mean I know it’s not her fault, but isn’t mine either. What should I do?
Here are a few comments on the story where it was originally posted:
