Many families have been put through the ringer in the last year as they have socially isolated themselves from one another in order to be safe. Holiday gatherings have been cancelled, birthdays have been postponed, and staying in touch digitally has become the norm. In this story a woman was surprised to learn about a key event that occurred in the months after she last saw her sister: Apparently, the sister had placed her first kid for adoption at the same time she welcomed her second. It was also found partially by chance, which made the story even more alarming. Read the story and let us know what are your thoughts on it.
My sister had a second child and we were all thrilled for her. She lives a few states over and we haven’t seen her this last year. She had one child 2 years ago with her bf and the other one was born last month.
Yesterday we had a family zoom meeting to see the baby and to say hi to my other nibbling. We get on, family starts to load in. Everyone is basically there thrilled to see the baby. We get to meet her new baby boy. After a bit I asked to see my niece as well.
My sister got quiet and very quietly said she doesn’t have her. My aunt questioned this and I was also confused. After a few minutes my sister said that in the beginning of January she put her daughter up for a closed adoption because she couldn’t care for two kids.
Everyone lost it. The whole zoom was a mess. We didn’t know. We never got to say goodbye. She didn’t have to do this because any one of us would have taken my niece. F***, I could have taken her.. Ive had multiple miscarriages/fertility issues and although I am currently pregnant I am stable, owning a home, and have the resources to have taken a toddler as well as have my baby. Important: My sister has always also said she wanted to have a boy mom.
I lost it. I called my sister a narcissistic c***. I asked her when she’d get bored of the new baby and get rid of that one too. I asked her how the hell she could do this without reaching out to family. I know my sister and I know deep down she just didn’t want a daughter. She was depressed when she found out she was having a girl but thrilled for this entire recent pregnancy. I called her a monster for making children she didn’t want to care for, like they were a novelty. I said some other things too.
At this point, my grandmother is a complete mess and says her chest hurts so I stop. My aunt who is with my grandmother goes to help her and turns off the camera. My grandmother ended up having a panic attack that they thought was a heart attack at first. I am so glad she is okay.
My sister has since cut off all contact from the entire family. My father is pissed at me for blowing up (I was the only one who did) and says that I pushed her away. He said he could have tried to convince her to reverse it but my verbal lashing completely ruined any chance of getting my niece back. I don’t think he understands what a close adoption means. Also, adoption takes a minute so for her to have it completed by January makes me feel this process was in place for a minute. I don’t think there’s any chance of seeing my niece again when the mother and father both signed her to be adopted. He’s mad at me because now he lost his granddaughter and is afraid he’ll never know his grandson.
My dad thinks I’m an a** for freaking out and “nearly giving my grandmother a heart attack.” I’m feeling guilty that my grandmother had such an extreme reaction but I feel that’s more because she lost her great granddaughter.